Common Misconceptions of Home Depot Customers

*The head cashier stand = a checkout

*Fastlane cashiers = not real people

*The cash in slot = where you slide your credit card

*The more you bitch = the the more $ you save

*Home improvement stores = a playground

*Lying = a discount on products

*Pens of cashiers = free for the taking

*Gazing slack-jawed at the self-checkouts = something will happen

*Just because the customer thinks so = it must be true

*If it isn't the answer the customer wants = it must be false

*If you spend more than $100.00 a year in the store = the associates must do your bidding

*Because you are the "customer" = you don't need common sense and you also don't need to show associates any respect

*If an associate says hello = you get to tell us (boring/life) stories

*Anyone in an apron = verbal punching bag

*If customers know you work there = they have the right to expect your help on breaks and days off

*Despite the fact that you passed more than one open register & the fact that the fastlane cashier did EVERYthing for you = you still think you have the right to bitch about how much you hate having to use the self-checkouts

*Because people work retail = they are obviously incapable of counting or performing other simple tasks

*Jabbing repeatedly at the accept button with your finger = you will get a response if you keep trying

Yeah it was kinda a slow morning so.....